Mom Code: What is it and Why It Should Be Followed?


Learn How Breaking Mom Code Can Break a Community

Every mother has been under the watchful eye of the parenting community at some point.  It does not matter if it was during a child’s meltdown, at a birthday party, or at the pediatrician’s office.  A mother is forced to be placed under the judgmental eye of another whether she likes it or not.  Mothers should not be judging of each other, and all should remember that motherhood is an elite club that deserves each other’s respect.  Below are a set of rules established by “Mom Code.”  To break Mom Code is to set out against your own community.  Keep these codes in mind the next time you find yourself thinking poorly about an average mother.

Don’t give that look – try understanding.  We have all been there.  That moment in the store when the cart is full and you are short on time.  All of a sudden, complete toddler meltdown.  Full nine yards, kicking, screaming, crying, climbing out of the cart, throwing things out of the cart, removing articles of clothing like that will change your mind.  As if that wasn’t bad enough you get the looks.  Those evil “What kind of parent are you?” looks from other women and mothers.  Remember the receiving end of this because it is breaking all mom code to judge another mother for her toddler’s breakdown.  We have all been in this situation, so moms please be kind.  Give a look of sympathy and “been there, done that” reassurance.  Don’t try to step in and direct nor judge, just be kind.  Every mom needs reassurance that she is not alone.

No stealing! This is not for those with itchy digits seeking a ten finger discount.  This code is for those moms who use other mothers as inspiration to the point of imitation.  Don’t cross that line where an idea becomes THE idea of another.  If your friend picked out a beautiful girls name that you wished you had thought of, don’t steal it because you went into labor first.  Jelous of a fabulous kid’s party you attended?  Don’t steal the whole theme and pass it off as your own.  Seek the inspiration, but give it an original twist and ALWAYS give the other mother the credit she deserves.

Cleanliness is not golden. Do not judge another mother for the state of her house, vehicle, or appearance.  We all have it rough and sometimes cleaning takes a backseat.  Be understanding of the situation.  If her appearance is that bad, then recommend you watch the baby while she spends some “me time” in a relaxing bath.

Girl’s night out. It’s okay to be that mother who is dutifully attending her family.  Just don’t forget about yourself or your friends.  A healthy mother is one who gets to remember who she is as a person every now and then.  No woman or parent should judge you for taking “Me time.”  So gather the girls once a month and have a girl’s night out.  No kids, no husbands, and no curfew.

Don’t harass. Every parenting situation is different.  Do not be a snob and think that a working mother is less than a stay-at-home mother.  This is not true and there are statistics to back up the benefits of children raised in a working parent household.  We are one community whether working, staying home, or working from home.  At the end of the day we are still chasing the same little legs, changing the same amount of diapers, and holding the same amount of responsibility.  No situation is better or rougher than another.


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