As a mom we have people pulling at us from all sides for 90 + percent of our day. Whether you work outside of the home or inside finding or creating solitude can be a challenge, so how can it be done?
I used to sit in amazement at the moms who took frequent outings by themselves or dates with their husbands, I thought they must be practicing magicians because there was no other logical explanation. Then I read a book called “The Slight Edge” where the author describes that everything you want to do is easy to do and easy not to do. I realized that for many things I was making choices that often prevented me from spending the time my soul and body wanted and needed to recharge. So I began to make different choices.
Following are three choices I made that changed the game for me and has allowed me to detach from the madness and find not only more time for me, but for my family while spending less time at my desk working.
1. Learn how to hyperfocus – Multi-tasking is a bad joke. Often in multi-tasking is when we leave things out, feel pulled, stretched and overwhelmed and just over all exhausted. When I hyperfocus my task gets done quicker, leaving me free time to do something else. If you are a serial multi-tasker this one is going to be a toughie but you will thank me.
2. Say it like you mean it – Every time you agree to chair another event, babysit your sister’s kids or finish your child’s science project because they ran out of time you sell a piece of your soul. You are not helping anyone, especially you. When you tell someone no, mean it. When you set a boundary, mean it. Don’t vacillate because you feel guilty or you get the puppy dog eyes. By saying no and meaning it, you will be more respected.
3. Mindset matters – Keeping your mindset positive about all things will help you grow in ways that you would never expect. I began to say things like, “My family wants me to be well rested” versus “My family wouldn’t care if I died from exhaustion as long as dinner is on the table.” I began to shift my perception of not only myself but my family and things began to change. My family now welcomes my Mommy’s Time Out Days, because they know when I come back I am refreshed and happier.
You need to learn how to create the situations you want with your family, your life, your marriage. You are NOT a victim or just a bystander in your life. Stop letting others use you up, begin to create the life you want and live your best life now!
Peace Love & Recovery