Don’t Stop Touching Me: An Open Letter to My Husband


Please don’t stop touching me.  Your touch is a reminder of who we were before we were parents.  Your touch is a reminder of who we are now.   And I need you to realize that who I am is now profoundly defined by the meaning of the world Mom.  Before, it was the word wife.  Before that, is was simply me.

Don’t stop touching me.  Your touch reminds me that in order to understand the evolution of my own identity I need to revert back to that girl I see in the frames of our house.  That girl I so long to be and just, for a moment, close my eyes so that I can fall hopelessly in love with you again and be reminded that this journey of motherhood isn’t a solo expedition.

Your touch reminds me that I have someone to share it all with.  Your touch helps me find my way back to you.  To us.  To me.

I promise to be better about embracing your touch.  And to try to see me through the filter that you use (for I know it is probably more healthy than my own filter).  I promise to roll over into your arms instead of constantly away from them.  I promise to try in the redefining of myself to not lose the essence of who I was because who I was is the person you first longed to touch.  It is the person that longed to be touched.  It is the person who started on this journey holding your hand.  I promise to always hold your hand.

If you promise not to stop touching me.

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lk herndon is a mother, writer, teacher whose debut children’s book, “Petunia”, has just been released on Amazon.

Shaped by her experiences growing up Southern, lk herndon tells sweet and simple stories. She earned her BA in Political Science, her MFA in Creative Non-Fiction and has spent more than a decade teaching high school subjects such as: AP Language and American Literature, Honors World Literature, World History, and American History.

While her days are spent in the classroom, the balance of time is spent as Mama to her Monogram Mafia (alongside her very favorite partner-in-chaos, former high school sweetheart and now husband of nearly seven years, BJ). Sneaking in time to write between the snuggles and squeals, lk herndon graces the world with a sneak peek into real life adventures sprinkled with overgrown imaginations and uncommon sense.

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  1. Beautifully written, painfully true. There is no question that having little kids changes your marriage drastically.

    I don’t know you, and you don’t know me, but a woman who can express herself as eloquently as you can and can love your girls so fiercely is beautiful inside and out. Keep trying to lose that last ten pounds if you feel like you want to, but please stop judging yourself for having it to lose. And never underestimate the renewing value of a shower and freshly shaved legs! It works wonders for your self-image.

  2. How beautiful and sad and touching! It’s so difficult to separate being a mother and then being an attractive wife when you finally get that rare alone time together. Most of the time its much easier to just embrace sleep because if our minds get going, it’s so easy to see all the things about yourself that has changed from when you first met.

    This was a great read – thank you for sharing!


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